Here it comes. Attack of the killer fake chickens. Will they escape from the laboratory and make it from “lab to table?” The answer is… yes. KFC has done it. They’ve created fake chicken in a test tube and coated it with their famous recipe, so you can’t even tell that what you’re eating has nothing to do with nature at all. Talk about Frankenstein, what will the ill health effects of these test tube 3D chicken mc-somethings be like? Unexplained diarrhea? Pinging headaches in the back of your eyes? Exacerbated fibromyalgia? Who knows, because it’s never been done before, well, except for Beyond Meat. Welcome to KFC, would you like to experiment with our cell-based bio-meat? Please sign the release form and press print or email for your copy. You may eat your lab nuggets now sir/ma’am. Would you care for some of our extra MSG signature migraine headache sauce? It’s free with proof of your covid vaccine.
Oh, it’s a debut performance, alright. Nothing but robots and food “lockers” so nobody has to look at or touch anybody, or talk to anybody, just get your GMO freak food with that good ‘ole MSG-loaded secret recipe, and be on your mask-wearing way. No covid worries for you, that is, until you get the vaccine for it. Ever heard of vaccine shedding? You could get the covid vaccine, catch covid because you’re susceptible from eating toxic fake chicken, then shed the virus to your family and friends, all because you got the vaccine.
Did you know covid attacks people with weak immune systems, like people who eat fast food all the time, including GMO canola oil, GMO sugar beets (MSG), and chicken loaded with antibiotics, bleach and hormones? Yes. It’s true. It’s all sourced. That toxic meal that just became a whole lot more toxic for your body, brain, and cleansing organs. Colon cancer anyone?
Hardly anyone realizes that one of the 11 secret “herbs and spices” in KFC’s original recipe (and others) includes MSG, the ever-infamous lab-concocted concentrated salt that causes migraine headaches so severe it can cause brain damage in infants. So, while you’re sucking down some Frankenmeat that’s genetically mutated to also affect your genes in this lifetime, you can also suffer from a horrible headache that’s so bad you can’t look at light or hear loud noises without wincing in pain and agony. Grab those aspirin, ibuprofen and tons of fluoridated water to wash them down, and your problems exacerbate every step you take.
That’s what you get for being dumb and getting excited about anything KFC delivers from their scientific laboratories. The bylines on the website may tell you it’s all sustainable and less of a carbon footprint, and… puke. Check your green beans, potato wedges, chicken pot pies, fake chicken legs, fake chicken wings, fake chicken breasts, fake chicken thighs for MSG, monosodium glutamate. If you see it on the ingredients, just say no thank you. It’s really not that hard to stay healthy if you don’t make yourself sick by eating laboratory food. It’s common sense folks. Lay off the pesticides and the hormones and maybe you’ll be able to think straight again.
KFC partners with 3D printing firm making genetically mutated silly puddy cell meat
Looks like chicken. Tastes like chicken. It’s got that chicken mouth feel. Problem is… it ain’t chicken. It ain’t healthy. It ain’t right. Coming this fall to a Living Vending Machine Outlet near you. From lab to table, KFC is proud to bring you that signature taste coated around bio-printed meat stuff. No more animal husbandry needed on Planet Earth, just use the “microelements” to grow this crap in a lab. Cheaper. Zero nutrients. Dumber customers. Perfect plan.
No more animal cruelty either, well, except to the humans who eat this junk science fake food. KFC forgot that humans are animals too, so actually, this whole campaign sponsors and promotes cruelty to animals. Oops. Sorry about your luck there Colonel Sanders. The middle man has been cut out, and the end result is the same. Sick Americans with cancer, diabetes, heart disease and dementia wondering, “why me?”
According to research available in the American Environmental Science & Technology Journal, the technology of growing meat from cells has a negative impact on the environment. Still, they’ll be “monitoring” the latest trends (that means investing heavily in sick care health insurance).
Welcome to the KFC post-coronavirus world where humans eat Soylent Green and develop mad-cow disease, while bragging about the “original recipe” at FEMA’s “nursing homes” next year. Don’t miss those pink buckets of cancer-causing chicken at the next Susan Komen hide the cure walk!
Tune your internet dial to FoodScience.news and make sure you’re eating food that comes from nature and hasn’t been adulterated in laboratories.
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